Hey all Youth'ets and anyone else reading the thread. I haven't posted in a while on the old Youth forum so I thought I would use it to talk about my much improved form of late! Anyway I don't want this thread to look like im bigging myself up or anything but I was just quite pleased with how things are going atm Anyway my improved form started about a month and a half ago. Me and my Dad went over to Spain in Torremelinos and played in all the money in/money out games at the BDO tournament over there. I played very mature and really anjoyed the week. In the blind pairs I got paired with a Nothern Ireland international player (didn't know at the time!) whos got many caps for his country. We took on a very good experianced player, and a young guy who has played for England Youth a good few times, a big belly and a big ego to match Anyway, i played steady in the game, didn't want to let myself down and after going 2-0 down we clawed it back and I hit the winning double to win it 3-2. I was surprised with how I had coped, not got annoyed with bad scores, and kept my calm to hit that double. Through the week I played well, even getting past the first round in two tounrys (one were I won my first 5 leg match, 3-0). Although I played steady over the week there was still something about my darts I didn't like having used these darts when I first started playing (4/5 years ago). I made a big switch from small stems to medium stems and since then I've played really consistent darts. I've won my county reserve game (Now won 4 out of 5) and I'm 99% sure I'm in the team for next month (last game of the season). Now I'm playing best darts of my life, htting 180s and especially 140's consistently, and really happy with my game. I'm just worried about one thing... I get very nervous on stage, and the county game next month will of course be on stage, and in the eyes of everyone there. If these type of games were played on the floor, Im sure I would play alot more the natural game. On stage I honestly think I only play 60% the game I can play and maybe 70% of how I play on the floor. If I am in the team for next month I will be extreamly happy but at the same time, as weird as it is, very scared. I don't want to let myself, manager or team down. I'm scared I will go out there, lose, look like an idiot and everyone will think 'Hes playing rubbish why is he bothering?'. If i could go out there without a care, Im sure I could play well, and the way im playing maybe win. But i care to much, i dream of winning just that one county game and doing myself proud. I know it sounds silly but I don't count myself a real member of the team until I do the business. Anyway apart from that little worry I have, my darts I am REALLY enjoying at the moment I think it will not be long till i hit two 180's on one night, which would be great. That for listening to my update, have a good day.